Tarot After a Breakup: What to Ask, and What Not To
The questions people bring to a deck after a breakup are mostly ones tarot cannot answer. Here are the ones it can, and the point at which to put the cards down.
6 cardsintermediate
The Between Two People spread
Six cards on a connection that involves someone else as well: what each side holds, what is unspoken, and what you are actually choosing between.
Draw the Between Two PeopleHow to read it
For the situation where a connection is not simply between two people, whether that is an ex still in the picture, a new attraction while attached, or a friendship that has become something else.
A serious note first. This spread describes a dynamic, not a person. It cannot tell you what somebody else is thinking, whether they will leave, or who they will choose. Any reading that claims to do that is telling you a story. The positions here are written to stay on the side of what a reading can honestly reach, which is your own position and what is being expressed into the situation.
How to read it: the "what is unspoken" position is almost always the reading. Situations like this persist mainly because nobody has said the thing, and the card here usually names what it is.
The last position is the real question. Not which person, but which version of your own life. Read it last and read it as being about you.
What each position means
- Where You StandYour actual position, including the part you would rather not state.
- The First ConnectionWhat that connection is, as expressed into your life.
- The Second ConnectionWhat the other one is, on the same terms.
- What Is UnspokenThe thing nobody involved has said. Usually where the situation lives.
- What It Is CostingWhat the unresolved state takes from you while it continues.
- What You Are Choosing BetweenNot which person. Which version of your own life.
Related spreads
- Love & Connection5 cards · beginnerFive cards on a relationship: yours, theirs, the bond between you, the obstacle, and where it is going.
- Shadow Work6 cards · advancedSix cards on what you have disowned: the mask, what is beneath it, its origin, its cost, its gift, and how to integrate it.
- Relationship Cross7 cards · intermediateSeven cards on the mechanics of a partnership: each person, what each wants, what each fears, and what holds it together.
Getting more from a spread
The question matters more than the layout. These help with both.
What Questions to Ask Tarot (and What Not To)
The question decides the reading. How to turn a vague worry into something the cards can answer, and the four question types that produce useless readings.
Can You Read Tarot for Yourself? An Honest Answer
Yes, but it is the easiest form of tarot to do badly. The four traps of reading for yourself, and the habits that keep a self-reading honest.
For reflection and entertainment. Not medical, legal, or financial advice.